“In every art, beginners start with models of those who have practiced the same art before them.  And it is not only a matter of looking at the drawings, paintings, musical compositions, and poems that have been and are being created; it is a matter of being drawn into the individual work of art, of realizing that it has been made by a real human being, and trying to discover the secret of its creation.”
                                                                                       -Ruth Whitman

My ambition in re-introducing this meaningful program is to advance connection between folks who believe that community and engaging in social responsibility is transforming and cultivates a more compassionate organization.  Additionally, this mindset offers multiple benefits to the participants.

In the process of developing the relationship, both mentor and mentee are also practicing authenticity, an invaluable therapeutic skill that will invite both parties to feel comfortable with vulnerability and thus, increased confidence.  My hope is that this newly found confidence carries over into intimate relationships, friendships, work relationships and ultimately therapeutic relationships.  Authentic connectedness is the key to healthier relationships, better health, and the reduction of burdening symptoms and disease.

This unique professional relationship can further self-compassion which assists in increased meaning and purpose for both.

In Victor Frankl M.D., Man's Search for Meaning, he discusses his experience as an Auschwitz concentration camp inmate.  In an attempt to find meaning in this horror, he developed Logotherapy which focuses on meaning as the catalyst for powerful change.

Just as Frankl’s focus in his circumstance helped him survive, finding meaning in your relationships and lives can help you get through difficult times.  Bringing in science, your choices can promote neural changes.  Being happier will strengthen your Amygdala and increase Oxytocin associated with trust and safety.

While considering involvement in this opportunity, ask yourself the following questions:

-What really matters to you in life?

-How can I role model/participate in a meaningful relationship?

-How does being a trainee/intern/licensed psychotherapist create meaning for you?

-How do you currently impact purpose?

-How can we cultivate leaders?

In my professional mentoring roles, having experienced suffering and not always “fitting in”,  has contributed to my ability to have compassion for others.  I am less judgemental, have less fear, and over time, have developed a greater sense of identity.  Had I been mentored as a pre-licensed or newly licensed clinician, I believe it would have nurtured my personal and professional development in profound ways.  It would have likely impacted my involvement in my community sooner, allowed me to discover talents while staying true to self, receive valuable feedback and resources, and the opportunity to practice skills relevant to professional and personal goals.

In mentor roles, I have benefited from mentees by giving to others which in turn, gives me pleasure.  It allows me to honor boundaries, and most importantly, build valuable relationships and connectedness.

Reminder: Mentoring is not providing coaching or clinical supervision to mentees.

I invite you to get involved in this program not only for yourself and your match but to challenge the culture of East Bay CAMFT.

Laura Friedeberg, LMFT, Mentoring Program Chair

Unriddling Relationship Loss with Compassion: The Foundation for Emotional Freedom

Laura Friedeberg completed her Masters’s Degree in Counseling Psychology from John F. Kennedy University.  She currently works with the criminal justice culture and provides clinical supervision to MFT trainees and interns.  Additionally,  she has marked experience working with adolescents and in private practice.  Look for Laura’s new practice in Albany (where she resides with her partner) toward the latter part of 2013.  She specializes in working with adults, adolescents, graduate students, and groups who have experienced profound loss in relationships.  Compassion and mindfulness underlie her work.  lfriedeberg@yahoo.com